See, he is a powerful King. He made our tiny fishing village rather prosperous, and provided most of us a decent living. The roads were clean, the streets were safe, the people cared about each other even though religions, cultures, languages, dialects and races may differ. He ruled with an iron hand and ran a tight ship. Respect was commanded Hitler-style – by imposing fear and penalties. We were a very fine village indeed, and we enjoyed the monarchy because, well, he did play his part and now instead of our house on stilts, we have houses on pillars.

His hobbies was wide and varied; and the personal favorite being games of chess. He won every chess game! The useless pawns were removed sooner than they could snap their fingers; the useful pawns were kept to dance his dance. I loved watching him play chess so brilliantly – his rulership was reflected in his chess style – the players moved so brilliantly across the black and white tiles that sometimes all I saw were gray swirls.

He encouraged freedom of speech and more participation from us, his people. He wanted our feedback and this freedom is named “democracy” on one of our folk songs. We sang it every morning in the village, believing every word of it – until we started seeing more and more villagers cast behind bars for expressing their views honestly. It is really brilliant – how could these villagers be so tactless and shoot off their mouths before they thought? Our King taught them how to be a better speaker by giving them time off work behind bars, and they had plenty of opportunities to reflect and think.

He was so brilliant that he kept all the villagers’ diligent harvests and catches (most of us farmed, reared cattles or fished for a living) so that his panel of hard-working paper-pushers were very well fed and too contented with their rewards to think of changing jobs. Our harvests and catches were also set aside for us so that when we grew old, we could still self-sustain without relying on anyone. He thought very highly of us, and wished us to live to ripe old ages, that was why he pushed back the retirement age. He had the foresight to predict that when we retire at close to 70 years old, we still had our meager ration (from they harvests and catches they set aside for us) to depend on.

He even managed to convert our transport system, telephone system, mail services into profits-generating outfits. This is something no one in the world should be able to do – especially when our transport (boats, in this case) are usually over-crowded, and comes once every half an hour. How brilliant is that! Medical costs and school fees are on the rise because of this thing called inflation. Wages and all forms of earnings remain quite stagnant, which is why most of us now have a full time harvesting or fishing job and we moonlight or try to invest in barter trades. Haha, see how brilliant the King is? He pushes his people to work hard and start businesses of their own, moving us all out of our comfort zones.

Recently, he even takes integration one step further by giving free education to students from other islands. He makes us and our children very noble because many of us had to give up education in our prestigious Fishing college and Farming college so that these foreign students have the chance to learn not just Fishing and Farming, but also our local language. We in turn, either forget about prestigious education here, or travel overseas to explore academic opportunities – see isnt this brilliant yet again? Like an exchange program!

Sigh. This King has more than one wife and years of experience taking care of his family. Perhaps he is getting old and too rich, his eyesight seems to fail him. He allows fun fairs to be built, and when he doesnt put on hearing aids, is unable to hear his people’s protests. Security has been compromised on many fronts, and foreign farmers or fishermen are invited to join the competition for fishes and maize in our humble land. I fear.

This King may have been powerful, but his success has seemed to make him complacent and uncaring. If I marry him, and I say the wrong thing at dinnertime, will I be thrown behind bars or will my jewelry be confiscated? But the other men asking for my hand in marriage – many of them have had no experience taking care of families. If I marry them, what kind of future will I have? What kind of lifestyle will I get to enjoy?

Oh well, I dont know. But, I guess, after being under the rulership of this King for so many years, having something different for the next five years may not really be that bad, right?

p.s. vote wisely, research extensively, do not be influenced by your peers or older generations

(photo courtesy of http://www.singaporemind.blogspot.com)

Shocked at the title, one would scroll down to read the fine print. This speech is exactly a great example of how our government and MM thinks for their innocuous people, all at the mercy of money. Retirement in this humble land is a fallacy, who could bear to imagine the unthinkable acts of daily visits to the parks, of pursuing a hobby, of enjoying the final years of one’s life? If we do not retire, the CPF monies in our existing accounts might not have to be utilized. Once we stop working, so does our mind, hence it would lead to senility and even Alzheimer’s Disease, shortening our lives. Which is why we should never stop working, we ought to work to our deathbeds.

Our MM is a fine example of this. Do you foresee any chance of him retiring soon? Nope. He is a fine example of someone who does not give up, not till his last breath (but then, he gets 3 million annually for his efforts… therefore, note the difference).

Therefore, if, even our MM is working so diligently and forgoing pleasures such as touring the world for pleasure, such as minding the grandchildren, such as daily mahjong sessions, what makes us normal Singaporeans think that we should retire? Working is the way of life here! After all, if we do not work when we are old, who is going to help out at McDonald’s counters? Who is going to sweep the streets of Singapore? Who is going to help collect cardboard and used cans for sale? Surely then, the employment rate would be affected too. Which is why the brilliant MM thought of this “Retirement Means Death” phrase, to wake us up and instill fear in us! See how insightful he is.

Courtesy of “http://www.snoc.org.sg/news20070817.php”

Singapore decides to hole (deliberate use of word) the 2010 Youth Olympics in Singapore. Yes, all in the name of wanting to increase tourism rate and in-flow of monetary resources from foreign countries. Ultimately, though, it is still a joke because:-

1. the sheer size of our stadium might shock or amuse the other foreign young athletes to the extent they might lose the games because of this newfound amusement and/or shock

2. supporters and spectators from all over the world would have the chance to read our “propaganda shyt” papers and further amuse themselves. Lets cross our fingers that during this period, the MM would not say things (as the above article) that makes a fool out of us.

3. All the foreigners landing in SG would probably be amused further, and find Singapore an eye opener. They have probably never been to another place where the streets are filled with the “Fine” signs, or seen such long queues for things like Hello Kitty, bubble tea and doughnuts. Any encounter with Singaporeans would certainly be an interesting experience too, for Singlish is the novel fusion for the much-used, much-respected English. However, by then, the number of foreign immigrants might increase significantly to the extent that bumping into a typical Singaporean might be a rarity.

4. Due to the land size and lack of hotel accommodations, many of these said spectators and supporters might not be able to book rooms for their stay. This could mean good business for J.B. hotels if the said supporters and spectators are desperate enough to want to watch the games in 2010. After all, its only across the Causeway.

No, I am not referring to hubbing as in, Starhubbing with Maxonline, Starhub’s Cable and mobile. I am expressing joy at being “hubbed” into an even larger arena. It makes me feel like an octopus with so many limbs and links, can the excitement be survived?

Singapore aims to be an education hub. Good try, which explains why and how the ex-pats are flocking here like crows so as to pursue their education. Which accounts for why NUS and NTU deigns to degrade themselves by accepting foreign students placements regardless of results. What doesn’t gel for me, though, is why then, are Singaporeans not being able to enjoy the privileges of this “hub” and instead have to resort to foreign universities, long-distance learning or private institutions just to get their tertiary education? Perhaps our academic prowess is already in tip-top condition, and even without a Degree, there are jobs readily awaiting us to take on them, is that the case? No. How can then New South Wales University’s fiasco be interpreted as well, could that be a good indication of Singapore’s level of preparedness to take such a giant step as an Education Hub?

Singapore also strives to be a Medical and Biochemical Hub. With the advancement in medical and scientific technology, it is not hard to see why Singapore would want to be a part of that. After all, hospitals are constantly understaffed, and medical fields are not easy to penetrate. Singapore is so desperate to retain the doctors that it has decided to lift the price ceiling for consultation fees and prescription prices, without regards of how many poor souls here who cannot afford to seek treatment. So Singapore decides to be a Medical and Biochemical Hub as well. This is a country that drugs are not available easily, and even household brand names cannot be sold over your average pharmacy’s counters without doctor’s prescription. Pray tell, if a patient needs the prescription tablet, why not just purchase from their doctor’s? It makes it more comprehensive that way! Just how ready is Singapore to be a medical hub really leaves question marks to the readers.

Singapore is an Arts Hub. Arts is greatly appreciated in Singapore and as we are a multi-racial country, Singaporeans should learn to enjoy artworks of different cultures and race. Youths are encouraged to pursue arts even though in Singapore there would never be Mozarts or Picassos, even though arts does not pay in Singapore, and regardless of the stressful workload the society’s children are juggling with these days. Esplanade was built for that purpose, to show the world that we are artistically-inclined when half of Singaporeans probably never even heard of “Impressionism” or refer to arts without conjuring in their minds images of pornography.

We are also a Sports Hub…. the ironic news is that most of the competitors who represent Singapore in Olympics or SEA Games etc are foreigners.  Research has also shown that Singaporean students study too hard to have time to engage in sports, and Singaporean working class spend too much time on chairs or couch.

Last I heard, we are going to evolve into a “job-hub” too.

Only a country as powerful and resourceful as Singapore can afford to be so many things at one time! I wonder if this lack of focus is the result of conflicts between different ministers, or are we merely trying to incorporate all the profits-generating means , or perhaps just sounding the markets out, being on scientific trials like a guinea pig, to see which works best?

I am a hubber!

Let me share a little on this.

CPF is Singapore’s version of “pension”, in which 20% of your monthly salaries are compulsorily deducted into your CPF accounts, to allow you to be able to support yourself by the time you reach, say, 55? Lately, though, under the belief that our humane lifespan has been increasing, the age that we could utilize these CPF funds has been rising steadily as well. The last I heard, it was a solid 70.

Think about it. You work so hard and save 20% of your wages, so that by the time you are 50 and get retrenched, you can happily look for jobs such as cleaning, waitressing at McDonald’s , or going around collecting cardboard, drinks cans etc for sale, just to supplement your monthly income and hopefully save more until you reach 70 years old. If you don’t kick the bucket first, you would be able to enjoy the $200 – $400 given to you a month, barely sustaining your three meals a day and awaiting the day you can go in peace. Farewell, dreams of travelling the vast world. Farewell, daily doses of golf and chess (mahjong, in this case). Farewell, lifelong dreams of pursuing one’s interests.

That’s our CPF aka “pension” scheme for you – at least feel proud that you are the one providing yourself the after-retirement income.

It is also one of those super-versatile and liquid schemes that change almost annually. For instance, the new ruling beginning April ’08, where the first $60K of our monies will be locked up and unavailable for us to do our own investments. I guess it is just not nice for Singaporeans to get smarter and know how to earn higher interest than what the CPF Board can offer us. How dare we try to contribute more monies to our own pension fund by such underhand means? We have to work for it!

Makes one wonder, doesn’t it… why is it that the monies in our Special Accounts cannot be used for housing, education etc? Is it because our caring government are afraid that we wouldn’t have any funds left when we are old and useless, and then they have to support their country’s old folks?

Why the CPF Board can guarantee us interest rates of 3.5% (OA) and 5% (SA) is because they use our monies for investments (mainly with bad foresight, we enjoy buying into crumbling foreign banks and other foreign companies in dire financial woes) .  When – note that I do not use “if” the investments fluctuate negatively and our monies kiss us goodbye, our government would gleefully cover up their incompetency and mistakes by adjusting the CPF rules, so that we do not discover that our monies are no longer sitting and waiting for us in the CPF accounts.  Sly moves, but why should we pay for other people’s stupidity, incompetency and mistakes?

Well, what say you on this?

Have you ever heard of a country that takes care of its immigrants and foreign labour better than its own people? Have you heard of a country that offers scholarship to its main university – for the foreign students who do not even score fantastic results, yet for its own people, we all have to struggle to get a place in said university. On top of that, scholarships are rare, for us.

Have you ever heard of a country that creates jobs for foreigners rather than its own people? In the pursuit of foreign talents, it seems that local talents constantly get neglected and un-groomed. I often read about other countries putting their people before all others, be it jobs-wise, education-wise etc. Looks like at least for Singapore, we are unique in that sense – we do exactly the reverse. Maybe that’s why we are so charitable… we enjoy letting our country’s funds flow out into other countries – when those foreigners remit money back to their hometown, when their contract ends and they happily return home with a fat paycheck.

Pray tell, wherein does loyalty lie, when your first class citizens feel second class in their native lands?